Some much needed positive reinforcement

 Yesterday I went back to Chilean school. 

I'm just messing. I went back because I had a parent-teacher meeting with my head professor. We call the professors in school "profe (pro-fay)".  Not super important but an interesting detail. If you're thinking that this meeting sounds ridiculous because I am a foreign exchange student and kind of just a pretend student in school, you would be thinking the same as me. But we went anyway, and goshdarnit just like everyone says, good things come when you least expect them. 

The meeting itself didn't take too long. Claudia and my professor talked for a while about Almendra and how she is doing in Germany and what her return plan for school was, which made me feel a little better because that meant that this meeting wasn't a complete waste of Claudia's time. In addition to that though, my professor asked me what I thought of school, my classes, my professors, etc. Basically just all of the routine things. 

I told him that I was enjoying school and even though it is very different from the U.S. I've had fun in my classes. I also said I feel like I've made some good friends and that I enjoyed participating in different clubs that the school has to offer. When he asked me about the teachers, I said I was very grateful for all of their patience and that I always try my best on the tests and homework as well as during class. 

This is the positive reinforcement part, brace yourself.

Basically my professor told me that all of the teachers sit down and evaluate the students that they have in class and that he had a few things he wanted to share with me from when my name was brought up. 

Firstly, he told me that he was impressed with my grades which I kind of brushed off because they really aren't anything special. We're talking low 80s, maybe an 85 overall average if you convert the grading scale to the one we use in Salem. As a chronic academic overachiever, this feels mediocre to me. 

I should probably cut myself some more slack because I have been doing all of my classes in a different language, but still. I'm done with high school, so really it's just a matter of can I understand the same material in Spanish, and even then school is still just a system you have to learn and beat.  It was nice to hear though that someone was impressed with what I was able to achieve academically in Chile, even if it doesn't match up to my normal standards. 

Next he said that there were a few key things that the teachers appreciated about my presence in school. The most obvious one being that they appreciated my outside perspective and that the students were able to connect with me and learn about the world simply because I am physically present at IRA (Institute of Rafael Ariztia aka the name of my school). The next thing he said was that they were very appreciative of my positive attitude and the energy that I bring to each class I am in and just the school in general. 

This made my heart really happy. I'm not gonna lie. It felt really good to be recognized on those specific terms. I try really hard to be a light and stay optimistic no matter the situation as a foreign exchange student. I've definitely written on here about how being an exchange student is sort of like being a really tangible ghost because my existence is so impermanent, but in this moment it made me happy that I could have some kind of positive impact on the people around me even if my Chilean life is constantly on a countdown clock. 

My professor also said that he thinks that the students in IRA are learning some valuable lessons from me about perseverance and also about the value of their home. They watch me marvel and experience Quillota for the first time, enjoying this beautiful culture that they live in, and it serves as a wakeup call that they have a lot of great things going on right in front of them. I'm glad I can help with this because I think it is an important life lesson to learn for anyone, anywhere in the world. 

Finally he said to me that when they found out that I was an 18 year old exchange student, they were all very nervous about how I would blend in with the student body. Especially because they were going to put me into classes with 16 year olds. He told me he is very pleased to report that there are no problems and they can't wait to have me back next year. 

Claudia chipped in one this part too because she said that she was also nervous to host me because I was 18. She revealed that the most recent girl they hosted was older and they had some trouble with her because of this, but she thinks that because I'm a country gal that is why I am more down to earth and able to adapt. 

I wanna reflect on this a little bit because it got me thinking. 

First of all, I never even considered that the people in Chile might have been nervous to have me because of my age. It frankly just never crossed my mind, because I knew that it would never be a problem because I wouldn't let it be one. But now that I think about it, there are a lot of people who took a risk on me and I'm very grateful that they did. 

Furthermore, I really started wondering if I have been able to find success throughout this exchange largely because I grew up in the country. Initially, I was like "no, it's more your personality Anna. I'm sure a kid from the city could do it the same" 

But then I got thinking about it some more, and isn't a lot of my personality defined by the place I grew up? We are getting into nature vs. nurture here, but I am definitely a person who believes that your environment has a big impact on who you are as a person. My rural background has shaped my values, my beliefs, and my behavior, turning me into the young woman I am today. There is most certainly a distinct tie between the success of my exchange and the fact that I grew up in upstate NY. 

To further this line of reasoning, I have met a lot of other foreign exchange students with a majority of them being from urban areas. Their approaches to foreign exchange are completely different. Not bad, just different. 

I feel very rooted in my reasons for wanting an exchange experience. I want to learn a new language and culture. I want to meet new people and forge connections. It is outside of my comfort zone and I believe it will help me grow personally. I think that Spanish will help me a lot in my future career. I believe that this year away from NY is one that I needed in order to find myself a little bit before I throw myself into 4 years of college stress.

 I know in my last post I talked a lot about how nervous I am that Chile is going to mess me up when I go back to Cornell, but I truly don't know if I could have gone to Cornell right after state office without a year in between. I would have burnt myself out. 

The point is though, I have a lot of very clear and genuine reasons for wanting to be on this exchange that help guide me through every moment. I'm not sure if the other foreign exchange students I have met have this same kind of compass. Could that be because they are not from the country? 

Who knows. I really don't think I am educated enough to answer that question. But it's some food for thought. 

That's really all I've got for today. Oh wait, after the meeting I went with Claudia to the market to buy food for the restaurant and I love the United States don't get me wrong, but the food prices in Chile have got us beat by a mile. 

Claudia probably spent around $200 dollars total (and I'm rounding up a little bit). She had the whole back seat of the truck filled with fresh fruit, vegetables, and fish AND in the bed of the truck she had a huge box of cabbage, four sacks of potatoes, two sacks of onions, some sacks of corn and some other stuff that I can't even remember. 

$200 dollars will buy you a tank of gas to get to the grocery store, a box of cereal, 3 strawberries and some milk if you're lucky. 

Some literal food for thought there for you. 

Now I'm officially done. 

Thanks for tagging along on this ramble. Miss you guys lots. 

Much love always,

Anna

It is officially Chilean Summer

 Seasons greetings from this New York girl who is as shocked as you are that she is missing winter a whole lot. 

I hope that you are all cherishing the chilly weather and the beautiful snow that has been gracing the New York forecast lately, because here in Quillota, Chile it is a crispy 80 degrees on the regular and the sun is so strong that some days I feel like it is beaming into my soul. 

I know that sounds like heaven for anyone who gets the winter blues, but I promise you I still have them except I'm just sweating instead of freezing. 

As the title of this blog post suggests, I have officially finished out the first third of my Chilean adventure and am heading into the second phase which is Chilean summer. Let me tell you about my last week of school and then we will jump into how I am feeling about these next three months of scorching heat. 

The end of the Chilean school year is very different from my American experience. In the U.S. or at least in NY, the end of the year is always stressful because we have final exams in almost every class and if you don't have a final you definitely have a Regents exam. This means that if anything, the pace of the end of the school year picks up and it turns into cram studying, extra long homework assignments, and in general is just a lot of go, go, go. 

In Chile, we don't roll like that. This last week of school was basically optional because we hardly did a single thing in any classes. We had a few funky awards ceremonies and presentations by different school clubs but apart from that there was really no reason to be there. For me, this week still had value because if nothing else at least I was surrounded by Spanish for the whole day and could practice a little bit. But for the average Chilean student, I really couldn't see the value in bothering to come at all. Maybe that is just the New Yorker in me talking though. 

I did end up asking one of the girls in my class why she even bothered coming to school at all and she told me that there is an attendance requirement and I suppose that makes sense, but still. If that was how the end of the school year had been in the U.S. for me, you best believe I would have found something more productive to do. 

Yeah, that is definitely my inner New Yorker talking. 

The last official day of school, which was Friday, December 5th, was equally as slow as the rest of the week. I spent a lot of time just sitting around with a few different groups of my friends.

 In the morning we technically had Economics class with my favorite professor, but we just played a Spanish word game which I was really bad at but it was still a good time. Then I went with Ornella and Angela to watch a dance presentation that was happening in one of the other patios which was interesting. Then after that I danced some Just Dance with Isi, before sitting down to talk with my friends Ben, Cris, and Nicole. 

Ben is actually German, but has lived in Chile with his family for about 10 years now, so he is fluent in Spanish as well as English. He likes to practice speaking in English with me a lot of the time, but don't worry, I always respond in Spanish. 

I will say, it is super nice to have someone to bounce translations and language idiocincricies off of every now and then. I'm grateful that we get along. 

The last event that we had for the day was a big huge Bingo game. With a legitimate pot and not just goofy stickers or candy or something. 

Yup, you read that right. They literally taught us how to gamble in Chilean school on our last day. 

Okay, okay, I know that is a little dramatic. But it cracked me up that in the U.S. you could never do something like that in school. Literally in order to play Bingo at the American Legion in Cambridge you have to be 18 years old or they won't let you in. 

Anyways, I lost at Bingo but it was fun to play with Ben and Cris because we just goofed around the whole time. From an academic standpoint, it definitely helped me practice my numbers in Spanish so that was really good. 

Before I left school that day, I said goodbye to most of my professors and Ben ended up giving me a water bottle as a Christmas present because we have an ongoing joke that I need one because I've been using a plastic one I bought in the Georgia airport this whole time. (Don't worry, I wash it. It was just easier than making a big deal about it) It was very thoughtful of him and it is the prettiest blue color so I will definately be using it. 

Now for how I feel about Chilean summer. 

So far, it doesn't feel that different from a weekend but that is probably because it is still the weekend. 

Mostly, the biggest thing I am nervous about is letting myself slip into a lazy routine. I would in general consider myself a person who likes to be constantly moving, which I've definitely mentioned in other blog posts but oh well. It feels really scary to have so much unstructured time on my hands. 

I'm not nervous that I will get bored per say, because I don't think that the constant chatter in my brain will ever let me get bored. But the lack of structure and stress that normally fill my days in the U.S. and on some level here in Chile when I am in highschool, will almost completely disappear. I'm scared to find out who I will be without that pressure and I'm scared that it's going to make me a slacker or something.

When I come back to the U.S. I have to attend one of our nation's top universities for four years and I need to be on my A game. I am terrified that Chile isn't pushing me the way I need to be pushed to be ready for that pressure. 

Mom tells me that that is a goofy way to think and that I'll be fine. She says I'm growing in deeper ways, even though they might not feel like they follow a straight trajectory of personal growth. I know deep down that she is right like she always is, but I think I am still allowed to be nervous because those are feelings. 

On a more external level, I'm also a little nervous about what my role will become within my host family. I don't want them to think I'm lazy or useless, but at the same time I really am more of a nuisance in the restaurant than anything. I try to help here and there when I can, but for the most part everything moves too fast for me to understand, let alone lend a helping hand. 

And this applies even more because the peak summer season is rapidly approaching and that is when the water park and restaurant will be filled with people and I know everyone is going to be really stressed which stressed me out. 

Wish me luck because it's gonna be an adventure.

That's really all I've got for now. Yesterday I did get to help in the restaurant a little bit because we were preparing for a large group that is here today. We packed desserts and I helped organize little meal ticket stubs so that was good. 

I can't believe it is literally December. Please know that if I saw you in the post office or out and about I would tell you Merry Christmas :)

Much love always,

Anna

Gambling in Chilean School